Title: Chode
Author: Annie Oates
Fandom: SpongeBob SquarePants
Pairing: SpongeBob/Patrick, Squidward
Rating: PG-13
Archive: You're delightfully insane if you want this. Ask.
Disclaimers: Sponges and Starfish don't generally get it on. Of course, they also don't usually have large bulbous eyes, vocal cords and strange senses of humor.
Summery: Patrick things about square pegs and round holes.
Notes: Inspired by 
azrhiaz, written for Two Lines - Fan Fiction Challenge
Feedback: Welcomed.
and the sight of your sleepy smile
eclipsed all the other people
ani difranco, "little plastic castle"
"Teeeheeeheeeheeeheee!" SpongeBob flailed his arms as he laughed helplessly.
Patrick hugged two arms around his middle and felt his own laughter die off. He'd never quite noticed it before, too enthralled by the blue of SpongeBob's eyes to be distracted. But... right there, in front of him... he could see the solemn face of Squidward's house through one of the enlarged pores next to SpongeBob's gasping mouth. Patrick suddenly wished he had more than two eyes so that he might be able to watch the gap between his friend's teeth as it was exposed to his giggles as well as explore this dawning of an idea whose secrets hid within the shaded, yellow holes.
"Is something wrong, Patrick?" SpongeBob had stopped laughing, having noticed his friend's intense stare.
Patrick stammered, "Uh, not really, SpongeBob. It's just..."
"Yes?" SpongeBob waited for an answer, when none was forthcoming, he tried to guess at the cause of his friend's uncomfortable silence. "Do I have kelp stuck in my teeth?"
Patrick swallowed hard as he watched his friend's red tongue slide into the gap between his teeth, quickly followed by his nimble fingers.
"Uh, no, it's just... you're square, but you're round." Patrick gestured to SpongeBob's pores with the tip of one arm, not quite touching the arcing edges.
SpongeBob looked down at himself and poked a finger through one opening, his eyes growing impossibly wider at the sensation. "Y'know, Patrick, you're right." With his finger forked through and the tip wiggling out another hole, he looked at Patrick piercingly, "And you... you're round, but you're all angled." Not having his friend's reservations, SpongeBob stretched out his free hand and ran it along the sleek line of one rounded, pink arm.
Patrick blushed a deeper shade of coral and tried to keep from making little ripples in the water with his tremors. He couldn't tear his gaze away from SpongeBob's finger, where it still wiggled out of his square body. "Uh, SpongeBob... we're friends, right?"
"Of course, Patrick. The bestest friends ever!" SpongeBob answered.
"Bestest," Patrick repeated. "Do you think maybe... I mean, would it be okay if..." Patrick trailed off, dropping his arm from where it had been pointing at one of the larger holes.
SpongeBob looked at Patrick, at his arm and at the hole. He wiggled his finger again, causing his toes to scrunch up in his shoes. He withdrew his hand and looked at Patrick bashfully, "You wanna give it a try... friend?"
Patrick nodded slowly, his mouth in a little 'O' shape. SpongeBob smiled invitingly and stepped forward, into Patrick's touch. Gently, reverently, Patrick traced the round hole and slowly pushed a little at the entrance. SpongeBob made a gurgling noise and Patrick jerked back, his arm stopped by SpongeBob's hand, which held him firmly.
"No, don't stop. It's okay... it feels... I like it." He quickly reassured.
Patrick nodded and tried again, this time working the tip into the opening. When he turned his arm a little, twisting the tip up SpongeBob yelped, though he was quick to reassure Patrick he was okay.
"It's... it's amaaaaazing, Patrick, please more."
Patrick smiled to himself and pressed deeper, stroking the smooth fibers inside SpongeBob's body. SpongeBob's knees quivered and knocked together, threatening to give way. Patrick quickly stepped forward and wrapped himself around SpongeBob, lowering them to the ocean floor. The soft sand beneath them moved out in low ripples and cushioned their entwined limbs. Patrick quickly removed his swim trunks and helped SpongeBob out of his shirt and pants. The shoes stayed on and Patrick liked that, liked the shiny black when it pressed against his back, digging into his pink flesh. Without the barrier of clothing, they pressed against each other wantonly and Patrick wrapped his five limbs around his malleable friend, the tip of each arm finding a soft opening to press into eagerly. Stroking and twisting, they writhed against and with one another, their moans carried out on the currents of Bikini Bottom.
Neither one heard the angry voice that called out above them, "Hey, get a room, you two!" Squidward had seen quite enough, he thought as he grasped the edges of his shutters. "Perverts." He added before he slammed them shut. He muttered in irritation as he stalked over to his chest and pulled the lid open. There, nestled within was his clarinet. He picked it up, stroking the wood lovingly. His look of ire faded into melancholy and he brought the instrument to his lips. His tentacles spread out over the keys in a familiar caress as he breathed out his song of sorrow.
Out in the sand, the sponge and the starfish pulsed as one and no one heard the sad music from the stone hollow in Bikini Bottom.